This is it.
November 8th, the night before
This is it. It has finally hit home. No more denial. It is really happening to me. I've been keeping so active and busy with things, like this journal and e-mails, that I've been able to take my mind off the reality of it all. Despite all the touching letters and phone calls wishing me well. It never really occurred to me that this (by some fluke) could be my last day on this earth. Or my last day as a functioning vital human being. The possibility of something going wrong is now there at the back of my mind. However, I will try to push it out of my mind as I write about other nice things that happened to me this weekend. Because that's what's really important.
My friends. They really love me. They really do. I well up with emotion every time I think about it. The previous chapter described the simple but great day we had Friday. Saturday was also special. Peter Griffin insisted on having us over for dinner. He and his lovely friend Nancy wanted to spend time with us. We agreed to make it an early one because we were all invited for cocktails at Perry Quinn and Mary Jane Grant's house for 6 pm.
We slept in quite late and around 12 noon I drove from Niagara-On-The-Lake (the small town) to St. Catherines (the small city) to buy a new colour printer as my old HP Deskjet, circa 1985?, is on its last legs. I went to the large electronics box store Future Shop and picked up the DeskJet 890 C. While standing there looking at the printer, the guy next to me said, "Hey, I know you! Aren't you the guy that played at Kevin's barn dance last Thursday night?" It turns out he was there and had a wonderful time and just loved the band. He was looking for a printer too. He had heard about my upcoming surgery and wished me well. (Such a small world).
I had a throbbing head ache as it was a drizzly grey day and I hadn't any coffee yet. So I stopped in at Starbucks for a double short cappuccino. The coffee shop was part of a humongous bookstore called Chapters. I'd never been in one of these large box books stores and it was quite overwhelming. I remembered that one my favorite singer songwriters, Nanci Griffith had a new book out so I asked a clerk to help me find it. It was funny because she also looked familiar. She then said, "I know you. Do you work at the Shaw Festival?" I said, "No, but you do. I just hang around as a local musician with my friend Herb Nelson." We were both right. She works in the props department where I've been several times, and I've also performed at several Shaw events and concerts. Small world again, twice in one day. In less than an hour. Wow. The book, by the way looks beautiful and interesting and it will go with me to the hospital.
While I was gone, Herb Nelson dropped off a most lovely bouquet of flowers, as he just does, most Saturday mornings. We usually pig out on the fresh pastries he brings from the market and I supply the expresso. When I got back, Dory's friend Heather was over and apparently she is going to drive in from Niagara-On-The-Lake to be with Dory for a couple days. She will probably sleep over at the house, which is good, so that Dory won't be alone. She'll be tired when she gets home, but it still might be nice for her to have someone to talk to other than the dogs.
Just had a hearty protein & iron filled red meat dinner. Mmmmmm. A fitting good-bye to solid food. Could be a few days before my next real meal. Hmmm, hospital "healthy heart" food. Probably not something to look forward to.
Dinner last night with Pete, Nancy and Steve Oprici was delightful. Pete, an excellent cook (and restaurant owner) went all out and we were all pretty stuffed when we eventually went over to Perry and Mary Jane's about 8 pm..
Steve & I shoot a game of pool while waiting for dins
Good dog Figgy eyes the veggie platter ~~ Pete, Nancy and Figgy hard at work in the kitchen
The party was in full swing and I slipped into a corner of the kitchen and hung with Penner. We had a nice chat and all the women were admiring his sweater which apparently had once been worn by Don Johnson, the actor. Penner's wife Susan is a writer and producer and had picked up this sweater left over from wardrobe and worn only once by Don in a movie scene. It was lovely and funny. Any story told by Penner (who is an excellent drummer, drum builder, and who once did a stint in stand up comedy) is funny. My biggest fear is that when I see him during my recovery, he will make me laugh. I know he will make me laugh. It's gonna hurt real bad. Honestly, I can't wait.
The party was a very weird experience for me. I wasn't drinking anything other than soda. Everyone was treating me with kid gloves and being so kind. We stayed about two hours and I had to get out of there. I was too emotional. You really can take the love of your friends for granted. But at moments like these it really becomes so obvious. They really mean it. The looks on their faces when we said good bye said it all. I have to hold back the tears whenever I think about these fine people. They have changed our lives, in just four years, since we moved to our weekend house in town. Just think, if we hadn't impulsively gone to see the real estate agents on that fateful day, things might have been so different. WE ARE THE LUCKIEST PEOPLE IN THE WORLD. In the province. In the city. Ok, in this room. Yeah, in this room. Well whatever. We lucked out. We knew nobody when we moved there. And now... Is it a dream?
Well it all feels like a dream. I still can't believe this is happening tomorrow. When I finish this and configure it for the net, I will take my sleeping pills and try not to think about it. We'll be at the hospital by 8 am and probably hang around with family and friends until they take me to the "holding area" (sort of like prison?) around 10:30. Then at noon, bingo!
So until I can get back to this - that's it for now.
But first some more e-mails:
(From my very hip 14 year old neice)
Subject: Hello!!
Date: Sat, 07 Nov 1998 18:40:45 PST
Hi..waz up?
Just wanted to say hi and that i know all will go well on Monday.....will b 4 u 2 hook me up with that bass lesson when your feeling good.
Love, Shari
______________________________________________________
Date: Fri, 6 Nov 1998 20:56:08 -0500
Dear Sarah & Vince,
As we listen to Lyle's take on Vince's song, I've Had Enough (one of my fav. songs on the cd, before I knew who wrote it!) we are reading your kind message.
">Also the best to those you love and who love you during this time...heck, you get the anesthetic and the red carpet treatment, but they have to do the worrying! "
Dory says you are so correct. I will breeze thru this thing with her by my side.
Thank you for your thoughts and kind words. I will definitely be taking all of the incredible messages I've recieved these last few days, with me on Monday, if not in hard copy, - in spirit.
Steve
Date: Sat, 7 Nov 1998 09:34:53 -0800 (PST)
Steve,
I just finished reading your most excellent journal! Brought back wonderful memories of my own experience, but also had me captivated with your funny and scary events over the past 2 years. What a great, easy-to-read website! Quite a contrast from mine (he he he).
>On my way home, I picked up a new Digital Camera (mostly to use for promotional purposes at work) but also for Dory to >use. I really want her to take a shot of me when I get out of the ICU with all the tubes and wires coming out of me. I can >blow it up real big and scare all my friends!!!
Jeez, where's you get such a cool idea from? Lookin' forward to seein' a photo of you smokin' that weird pipe, man!
I have all the confidence in the world that things will go just fine. You have excellent support and the best health care possible. See ya on the web wicked soon, okay?
Peter dellaFemina
The Negative Guy
(probably away from my Mac)
_________________________________________________________
Subject: Re: Re 2: The Bum Ticker Date: Sat, 7 Nov 1998 16:42:47
Peter,
Thanks for the note. As Monday morning looms, it's great to have all these new found, far reaching friends.
>I just finished reading your most excellent journal! Brought back
>wonderful memories of my own experience, but also had me captivated
>with your funny and scary events over the past 2 years. What a great,
>easy-to-read website! Quite a contrast from mine (he he he).
Thank you. Wonderful memories??? I found your site totally easy to read and captivating as well. I couldn't
put it down. And of course it inspired me to do mine.
>Jeez, where's you get such a cool idea from? Lookin' forward to seein'
> a photo of you smokin' that weird pipe, man!
Very funny. It was your idea totally! I give you 100% credit for all of this.
I am actually suckin' on that plastic pipe right now. (see attached)
>I have all the confidence in the world that things will go just fine.
>You have excellent support and the best health care possible. See ya
>on the web wicked soon, okay?
Yessir I'm out of here. Steve
Date: Sun, 08 Nov 1998 00:13:08 -0500
Subject: Hi!
Hi Steve,
So...do they allow computers in the hospital? If not, they better get hip! Didn't realize you were going in 2 days before but I read your journal notes today and I think it's great you're writing so much.
Like I said, you're the toughest guy I know and you'll get thru this with flying colours. And later, you can proudly display your scar. The result of a hard battle fought but a hard battle WON! Maybe we can all sign it! Just like if it was a cast! Hey..now there's a new concept on "owwies" we can use!
I'm holding a toast to you as I write this and I'll be thinking of you on Monday, knowing you're in great hands and knowing you'll breeze through this!
To you my friend....lots of love, Tessa and of course, the hairy kids XOXO
Date: Sat, 7 Nov 1998 09:55:10 EST
Dear Steve and Dory,
I know you are counting the hours down, now, and I just wanted to give you one more well-wish before the big day. I finally had a chance this morning to sit down and read your journal and really enjoyed (I think that's an okay word) it. Being a HUGE sissy when it comes to MRI tubes (major claustrophobia), IV's (they never hit my vein the first time, ever) and most anything else having to do with medical processes, it was reinforcing to read that you found things distasteful as well, being a guy and all. Also, I found your glimpse of the Canadian health care system very interesting, as one of my passions in life is health care policy (I know, boring, but still important.)
But enough about that--chin up, be strong, take care, and know that my thoughts and prayers (like many others) will be with you and your families as you endure this trial. You'll be back "singing out loud" before you know it and good to go for at least another 1,000,000 (air-lol) miles!
Cate, "this heart was born feet-runnin'" in Atlanta
"Peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you...not as the world gives, give I unto you; let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid." John 14:27
Date: Sat, 07 Nov 1998 02:19:41 -0500
Subject: Re: Today's Bum Ticker Update
What a wonderful and enlightening experience you have shared with all of us...thanks for directing me to your journal. As human beings, we are all connected and the relating of your personal experience and thoughts from friends and family is a wonderful reminder that we don't have to go through anything alone.
Having said that, please know that you are in my thoughts as well, and feel in my heart (no pun intended) that all will be well. I'll be checking in later on Monday.
As for that piece of cake I talked about?......I'll be bringing some over!
Dale
Part 11 - Home Sweet Home /
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